"Transformation is a process, and as life happens there are tons of ups and downs. It's a journey of discovery - there are moments on mountaintops and moments in deep valleys of despair." -Rick Warren
Despair is defined as "the feeling that there is no hope and that you can do nothing to improve a difficult or worrying situation." In layman's terms, it can be called a loss of hope. We feel despair now and then in our lives. It is a very common feeling for every human being to feel. At times, the person just wants to give up. They might feel like there is nothing they can do to get out of their problems. For example, you are watching a cricket match, and then you look at the scoreboard. You sigh in despair that your favourite team cannot win, no matter how hard they try.
What is Depression?
Now that we understand what despair feels like, let's look at what depression is and how it differs from despair. According to the American Psychological Association, depression is a "negative affective state, ranging from unhappiness and discontent to an extreme feeling of sadness, pessimism, and despondency, that interferes with daily life. Various physical, cognitive, and social changes also tend to co-occur, including altered eating or sleeping habits, lack of energy or motivation, difficulty concentrating or making decisions, and withdrawal from social activities. It is symptomatic of a number of mental health disorders."
How is Despair Different from Depression?
People often confuse depression with despair, or they use them interchangeably. But there is a fine line of difference between them both. Some examples of differences include:
When a person is in despair, they still function normally and can do their day-to-day chores. However, in the case of depression, the person might also not feel like getting up from bed or doing the regular stuff.
Despair is generally considered a symptom of depression. However, if despair is not treated, it can progress to depression.
One of the main differences between the two is that depression is considered a mental disorder that lasts for two weeks or more. Despair is a feeling that a person might experience in their lives at some point. It is not a disorder, generally.
Depression manifests itself in a variety of ways, including fatigue, a lack of energy, eating disorders, and sleeping problems. If not severe, despair only manifests as emotional responses such as hopelessness and pessimism.
Dealing with Despair
If one ever feels like a wave of hopelessness is about to hit their life, they should not just give up, even if it's easy to do so at that moment. Here are some ways a person can deal with despair and overcome it:
Talk: Don’t just sit idle, feeling bad for yourself. Start expressing your emotions. You can talk to a friend, a family member, or any other person you trust. You can also ask for help from a therapist. If one has no one to listen to or cannot afford to see a therapist, they can also try free online listening services like SpeakyourMind.in
Acknowledgment: The first and foremost step is to acknowledge your feelings. Despair is a negative emotion, and recognising it is important in order to deal with it. Denying it is never the solution. You must sit with it and try to understand what exactly is causing it. Writing down your feelings is a good way to start acknowledging your emotions. Try not to repress them. One should not pretend to be happy if they are not.
Meditation and Breathing Techniques: Some time-tested methods for when you are feeling low or experiencing undesirable emotions are meditation and breathing exercises. Practising these along with mindfulness can provide a sense of calm and peacefulness. This can help you understand your situation better and subdue your anxiety.
Reflection: Reflecting on your thoughts and thinking process can help you find out why you're feeling the way you're feeling and what caused it. This might help in reaching the root of the problems.
Form an action plan: Once you know how and why you are experiencing despair, think of solutions to overcome it. It won’t go away on its own; you must act on it. Prepare an action plan. Try to fix the root of your problems. If you feel like it is something out of your control, focus on accepting it instead. Try out tasks that may help you take your mind off of it for a while; indulge in recreational activities like painting or dancing or whatever else makes you happy.
Conclusion
Despair is a sense of hopelessness, whereas depression is considered a major mental disorder. Despair and hopelessness are common things to experience; however, it is possible to feel full of hope again. Practising mindfulness can help you feel better and deal with despair. You can seek professional help if necessary. Life is all about the ups and downs, but it is necessary to learn to accept and deal with setbacks.
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